• a-2024-message-from-your-kids

A 2024 message from your kids

With thanks to Family Justice Young People’s Board

A 2024 message from your kids

Dear Mum and Dad,

I understand that you don’t love each other anymore and don’t want to live together, and although it’s sad it’s better than you arguing and frightening over me all the time. This is what I want you to do.

  1. I love you both and I want to see you both, but I don’t want you being nasty about each other in front of me. It makes me feel really bad …and remember I can hear you even when I’m not in the same room.
  2. Please sort out who pays for what. While I am young and go to school or Uni, I won’t be able to support myself. I rely on you both.
  3. Don’t make me spy on my other parent or pass on messages. Don’t interrogate me about the other parent when I come to your home. I’ll tell you about it when I want to.
  4. Don’t be possessive about me or things that belong to me. I want to belong to you both. Sometimes I have to take my football kit or bike to my other parent. Please make this easy for me.
  5. I understand that grown-ups plan my life, but please ask me and keep me informed about what you decide.
  6. Don’t make me feel guilty about seeing my other parent.
  7. Don’t ask me to choose between you.
  8. Don’t make permanent decisions about me when you are in a bad mood.
  9. My birthdays, holidays, school events, family events are all special to me and I may want to spend time with both of you on those days.
  10. I have two sets of family. Dad’s and Mum’s extended family and I want to see them all. Just because you may not like them does not mean I don’t too. Talk to me about it. Don’t assume my feelings are yours.
  11. Don’t get upset If I want to spend time with my friends. I’m growing up!
  12. Remember I may not always want the same as my brother or sister.
  13. Don’t ask me to lie to my other parent or professionals.

I want you to feel happy for me as I grow up and learn stuff. I know you are both not perfect and make mistakes and so do I but, despite everything, I love you both to bits. Remember… if the other parent gets a new partner, I’m cool with that. It will make no difference to how much I love you. 


Your kids


More News

CMS debate in Parliament

Mobile phones in schools, Government guidance

Is marriage going out of fashion?

The Budget 2024 – What’s in it for our Kids?

Alfie Steele RIP.

UK Government Signs Up To Hague 19 Convention

Changes to MIAMS from April 2024

What Our Service Users Say

” What an amazing organisation, offering help, support and advice. A really informative and pioneering charity. Thank you! ”

Families Need Fathers Testimonials - What Our Service Users Say

“ Excellent charity, and volunteers that gives hope and support with practical information, not only to fathers but grandparents / extended family too. A lifeline in devastating situations where ultimately the children are the focus. If contact with your child or grandchild is broken, this is the organization for all relevant information, support and understanding. ”

Families Need Fathers Testimonials - What Our Service Users Say

” I don’t know how I would have coped without the Shared Parenting knowledge and empowerment from the peer support of FNF. Women are welcome in most settings. ”

Families Need Fathers Testimonials - What Our Service Users Say

” FNF taught me about the realities of the UK Family Court system at a time when I was very vulnerable and in need of guidance. Their ‘Surviving Separation’ course is excellent. ”

Families Need Fathers Testimonials - What Our Service Users Say

” The only charity to support any parent or grandparent to regain contact with their child or children, I regularly attend the Manchester group once a month to provide support. ”

Families Need Fathers Testimonials - What Our Service Users Say

” Without this group I would have been lost. I am the grandmother of a son who had his children taken away by the mother and false allegations submitted to ensure no contact. It has been heart breaking but reading the stories, being part of a community and having access to meetings gives information, advice and the hope and knowledge that it can change. I will keep supporting my son and grandchildren so they are together in the future. ”

Families Need Fathers Testimonials - What Our Service Users Say

” Families Need Fathers is an inclusive organisation that supports mothers, fathers, and ultimately children. I have personally found their support to be invaluable and truly believe it has saved my life and helped me become a stronger, resilient, and positive human being, father, and husband. They have educated and coached with my own personal development, positive co-parenting, positive parenting, and Family Court and the legal/court process. In that order. The peer-to-peer support is unmatched…I’ve never experienced a more active and supportive group of individuals brought together by a single goal – Happy Families! ”

Families Need Fathers Testimonials - What Our Service Users Say